Stand Up To Cancer

Seventeen years ago my mother was diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma. My sister and I were with her. Ready to give support and to lend our ears, we accompanied our mother to a doctor's appointment. However, I could never have imagined what I was about to hear. "What the (bleep) is Multiple Myeloma?" we asked. Yet my mother knew. Still, she didn't cry, not one damn tear. She left the tears for the rest of the family to shed. The day she learned of her incurable cancer my mother remained strong and self-contained. She always had been and always would be. The doctor delivered the sentence to us that very day . . . six to nine months to live. However, Mom didn't give a damn what the doctors said. I believe she made a pact with herself that day. While she had not always been able to live her life the way she envisioned, she was now determined to end her life when and how she chose. My mom fought hard and lived three years fighting her cancer every day. In the end, she controlled her life and her death.

Seventeen years ago, you couldn't just Google Multiple Myeloma. So I went old-school and visited library after library, learning whatever I could. What I discovered was not encouraging. In fact, it sucked. Yet it never brought Mom down. During her three-year struggle, I would hear her talking to herself in the mirror many mornings. She would often repeat, "What am I going to do? I didn't choose this, but here I am. So I will put one foot in front of the other and I will walk out into the day and make the most of it." She absolutely did - every single day.

My mom was a remarkable woman. In the 1940s, she attended Ann Arbor Medical School while studying to become a doctor. However, when her mother died of cancer she left school to take care of her father and brother before he left to fight in WWll. While taking care of them, she went on to graduate from Purdue University with a degree in medical research. Despite not quite reaching her goal of becoming an MD, her accomplishments were great. She excelled in her medical research career until she chose to give it up in order to raise her five children.

In the end, my strong and fearless mother passed away from kidney failure that was attributed to her fight with cancer. She made the ultimate decision not to go through dialysis. Her medical knowledge allowed for her to make the decisions regarding when and how she wanted to go. She knew that by refusing that last and final stage of treatment she could have full control of her body and die peacefully. I brought her home on my 40th birthday and said my goodbyes to my strong and fearless mother, Maeta Rosengard.

It is in her memory that I stand up to cancer.

On this Mother's Day, let us remember all those moms we've lost and all those in the fight. One out of every three women is affected by cancer. Today we stand up in memory of all those moms we've lost, and all those moms who are in the fight against this vicious disease. Launch a star in memory of someone you love here.

--Sue Schwartz